This Floating Poo Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the Television Letdowns of the Past Year.
As we consider the TV landscape of the past year, a handful of series stand out not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from awkward sequels to bafflingly bad documentaries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.
The 'Sex and the City' Sequel
Where to begin with this divisive follow-up? Plagued with dreadful writing, cringe-inducing arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show fought to find its footing. For a moment, as the final series began, it looked like it had at last found its groove. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the last series. It concluded on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, fans certainly found joy dissecting every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a little sob?
The Kim Kardashian Drama
‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’
But that was almost the smallest of this show's issues. The subject of a very rare zero star review, it was difficult to know where to begin listing the flaws. The laughably leaden writing? The tedious veneration of affluence and materialism? The almost deliberate procession of tropes? Acting so bad they felt borderline malicious? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and forget about this show again. However, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.
The Charlie Sheen Documentary
Considering the restraining orders, abuse allegations and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d really have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this volatile personality was being indulged, so any pity this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charismatic but flippant egotist.
The Iris Affair
Naturally we understood it was ridiculous from the get-go: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ended up slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.
MobLand
Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its gangland drama back.
Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly dull; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney rogues which seemed a bit basic.
With Love, Meghan
Given the degree to which she provokes the ire of certain performatively enraged commentators, it’s almost easy to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into quaint lifestyle as deliberate provocations. But then you view them and are forced to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine come to life; a poster for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All underpinned by vast, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.
Victoria Beckham
There are obviously interesting things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this three-part series chose not to explore them. Rather, the viewing was like consuming a sales brochure. She obviously has good reason to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any helps with this cagey letdown of a series.
The Inheritance
It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s still too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was trying way too hard to live up to something far greater than it.
The Lena Dunham Romcom
How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The expectation was immense for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity cameos involved felt uncomfortable.
Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping
Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.
Given the shrewd recruitment of talented younger comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar irate mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.
The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox
This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lumbering from strangely breezy, slightly stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A total mess? Very much so.
Prime Target
We love the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about government agencies targeting – and eliminating – academics frankly got more farcical by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.
The Bonnie Blue Documentary
This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual exploits as she undertook her most extreme challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was way more examination of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.
